My name is Olga. I live in Ukraine. I have served in the role of
translator/interpreter for Western men seeking to meet Ukrainian or
Russian women. In the process over the years, I have observed a number
of things about these encounters, some good and some not so good. I
would like to talk about some of these observations. Today, I’ll talk
about cultural norms.
Social norms, or the idea that the certain
things should be done in a certain way in a society, play a very
important role in our daily lives. Often they play a positive role as
they provide clues as to what to expect in a given situation. Things as
simple as smiling at each other and greeting each other when we meet
someone expecting the same in return, would be an example of this.
Everyone
in a society knows the rules and regulations of everyday life and we
don’t need to create these rules every day. They simplify life
routines. This system of norms is often used by public figures to
predict public reaction to certain actions or decisions.
With
all their advantages, our social norms can hinder us when looking for
love, searching for a life partner, especially one from abroad. Since
childhood we were told that every woman and every man deserves happiness
and love and we created an image in our minds as to the ideal partner
based on these social definitions, even stereotypes. I don’t only mean
physical traits such as hair color, height and weight of the future
partner, but more important things such as the number of positive traits
the future partner should have. Things like humor, or integrity, or
work ethic, might be some of these traits.
The main challenge in
dating foreigners is in these different social constructions that are
built on different cultural platforms. We often are told that all
humans are the same fundamentally, where we seek things such as freedom,
equal rights, respect, and such things like this. This is only a
partially true. Even males and females of the same culture often seem to
be creatures from different planets, imagine how much more so those
from different cultures!
First of all, we often prefer not to
remember that since the dawn of human history the development of
cultures and norms were rooted in certain religious ideas. You can
accept it or not, yet it’s enough to say that the influence is
extensive, ranging from art masterpieces inspired by religious views, to
bloody wars fought on religious principles, to church regulated social
and mental development over thousands of years. It is only in relatively
recent history has religious ideas stopped playing such a central role,
at least from my perspective.
The point is that religious ideas
differ in different countries and what is a hundred short years of
relatively less impact compared to thousands of years of profound impact
on a people and nation!
Beyond religious and philosophical
histories, there are genetic histories that help define the appearance
and characteristics of a people, making them distinct in many ways.
I
hope this rather long introduction will make us think about how very
different we can really be from each other, even though we may look
similar and maybe even converse in a similar language. I am convinced
that when an American or a EU citizen starts looking for a wife in
Russia or Ukraine, he first of all will want to find as much in common
with his future wife as possible, but also understand in what ways she
is different. Could people who have grown up on different planets be the
same? Of course not.
Yet, it doesn’t mean that couples from
different countries cannot be happy together. Moreover, they often have
better chances to create a happy family than those from the same
country, due to those different yet complementary perspectives.
My
hope in this introduction would be that Western men would open their
eyes to see past their own preconceived notions about these women and
value the unique aspects the Russian or Ukrainian wife will possess and
what she can bring to your life. Until next time.
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Article Source: http://www.compensationsecrets.co.uk/